Saturday, February 12, 2005

Dear Courtney,
What do you think about the smart water? Should I try it?

Signed,
Coward

Dear Coward
,
Its funny that you should ask. Courtney tried it today, and for a brief while, she was BRILLIANT. (And this was after only 8 ounces.) People were coming by as if she were her own little freak show (this is nothing new, but today they were asking hard questions and Khortney didn’t miss a single one –93 million miles. Alternating current. Roosevelt [Teddy], and so on - you can imagine the questions.) But while she was way up there, lookin’ around, it occurred to her what a shitty and mundane job she had, and it wasn’t really that great to be so freakishly smart, AND have this job. About then, her boss came by and said, “ya know, trained monkeys could do your job,” and as usual, Kortknee said, “but they wouldn’t”.

Have you read Flowers for Algernon lately? That is so sad. I’m coming down off the water, thinking about that book, for some reason. What we really need is not Smart Water, but “Love the Rut You Live In” water. Wouldn’t that be great?